Toddlers,
teenagers and puppies are so similar at times that the only thing separating
them is whether they are covered in fur and if have you look up or down to talk
with them. As it happens, I am still able to look straight ahead to talk with
my teenager but she is quickly over taking me and soon I will have to look up
at her to tell her off. I think the step I bought at Ikea will become useful
then although I am not sure how scary I will be if I first have to drag the
step over to her and then say: Tidy your room now!
So here are
what I think puppies, toddlers and teens have in common:
1. All of us gaze down at the quiet,
sleeping toddlers, puppies and teenagers after a long day of trying to contain
them and think: Oh my, isn’t this the most beautiful creature ever created. And
then we sneak out of the room as quietly as we can so as not to wake them up
for fear of losing that feeling!
2. They are LOUD! Toddlers throw
tantrums, puppies bark and teenagers throw tantrums….
3. Neither toddlers, teenagers nor puppies
respond well to a raised voice. If you want cooperation then positive reinforcement
is the only way forward. Some people
call it bribery but these people probably write books about behaviour instead
of having to manage it 24 hours a day.
4. All of them want you to ‘leave them
alone’ but all of them constantly demand your attention… go figure.
5. They teach you how to be patient and
then they give you lots of opportunities to practice!
6. For some reason all of them have an
ongoing war with the walls and doors in the house! My teenager daily tests the
strength of the door hinges by slamming them shut so hard the entire house
shakes. She has also adorned her newly painted bedroom wall with ridiculous
amounts of blue tac (prestic for you South Africans reading) and doubled sided
tape to hold up the photos of strange looking boys in bands people over the age
of 15 have never heard of! Toddlers love helping us decorate our walls with
their crayons! Paper is boring when you are 2 isn’t it? Walls are much easier
to use when practicing how to hold a pen correctly. And puppies? Well, I have a
friend whose puppy ate a hole into the living room wall. I don’t think I need
say more about puppies and furniture….
7. Toddlers, puppies and teenagers will
eat through every morsel of food in your house whilst you aren’t watching because
you are too busy trying to clean the walls before a child and dog free friend
comes to visit! And then they will whinge at you all day about being hungry
until you go and empty your purse for more!
8. On the subject of food: have you ever
tried to eat something a toddler or puppy can’t have without them noticing? It
is impossible- they can sniff out the crisps from upstairs! I think their brains are wired to hear packets
open but not hear their name being called! And teenagers will happily point out the fact
that you said you were on diet but you are now eating crisps. Can’t stick to
your diet mum? Grrrrrrr yes I can and these are baked low calorie crisps so
they don’t count!
9. All three are obsessed with their
body parts…..
10. Do you remember the days when you
could pretend that everything was not falling apart when it really was? For
example, you and your partner could spend the whole drive to the party yelling
at each other, still throwing little snide comments at each other as you walk towards
the front door but as soon as the door is opened you have an enormous ‘all is
wonderful’ smile on your face? Liar liar pants on fire! But as soon as you try
and pretend that life is great when it isn’t, your puppy, toddler and teen fix
that. If you had a toddler in the car on
the way to the party they would announce loudly that ‘mummy called daddy a bad
name in the car’ as soon as your friend opens the door. And your teenager would
most likely do the same but in more detail. They say dogs can feel your
emotions, knowing when you are stressed or upset. They can and will behave as
if the world is ending! My dog would follow me around whining and refuse to
listen when we were out if I was stressed!
11. Toddlers don’t need help from anyone,
they can do it ‘by mine self’. Puppies can walk just fine off the lead that’s why
they pull you along, they don’t need help staying off the road and teenagers
know you are stupid because what has your life experience from the ‘olden days’
got to do with them anyway?
12. But most of all toddlers, teenagers
and puppies make our lives happier and more colourful! We would be so very
bored without them!